No Such Thing

On being an atheist

I’m an atheist because believing in a magical man who lives in the sky, who has always existed, created the universe and everything in it, built the earth in less than a week, spoke to ancient tribesmen using plant life as a cell phone provider, approves of slavery and child-killing but not eating shell fish or drinking beer on one day of the week, condemned all of humanity FOREVER to die because one person ate an apple, sacrificed his only son to himself so everyone else’s sins would be forgiven, is omnipotent, omniscient, omnipresent and eternally benevolent yet still allows murder, rape, incest, starvation, disease and genocide is fucking retarded.